Conspiracy Theorists Eat Humble Pie

A friend in need’s a friend indeed
A friend with weed is better
A friend with breasts and all the rest
A friend who’s dressed in leather – PLACEBO

(Conspiracy Nation, 03/15/07) – Conspiracy theorists have been made to eat humble pie, consequent to the air-tight confession of Khalid Sheikh Mohammed (image, left).

Previously, the theorists had doubted the official version of the events of September 11, 2001. They had trouble believing 19 Arabs with box-cutter knives could have defeated U.S. air defenses. But with Khalid’s confession that he did it, the conspiracy theorists have been forced to throw in the towel.

I might as well get rid of all my conspiracy books now,” stated one theorist. “I guess I’ll study accounting instead.”

Besides being responsible for the terror events of 9/11, Khalid admitted to guilt for the 1993 World Trade Center bombing, the Bali nightclub bombing, and for planned attacks on Big Ben, Henry Kissinger, and Santa Claus.

And what about the JFK assassination? “Yes, I shot Kennedy also,” revealed Khalid. “I also murdered Nicole Brown Simpson.”

Khalid’s air-tight confession has sent shock waves through the community of conspiracy theorists. “Well, that’s that,” stated the editor of Conspiracy Nation. “There goes our wonderful cottage industry, where we were making so much money. Might as well fold up the tent and join the Republican Party now.”

Conspiracy Nation


One Response to “Conspiracy Theorists Eat Humble Pie”

  1. Jack Mehoffer Says:

    A friend in need’s a friend indeed
    A friend who’ll tease is better
    Our thoughts compressed
    Which makes us blessed
    And makes for stormy weather

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: